I was browsing in Ulta the other day. It’s a beauty product supply store, and I like to peruse their hair care lines, and pretend that I style my hair every day instead of pulling it up in a pony tail.
I walked through the perfume section because it was the same day I posted Smelly Memories, and I was trying to remember more.
Research, you see?
An Artist’s Date even. (Julia Cameron? Anyone? No? The Vein of Gold was one of the first books about writing and creativity I ever read).
I came across a new scent that disturbed me:
And I cried for my niece who might already own this perfume or want to purchase it in the future. This will probably be one of her embarrassing tween memories, like NKOTB is for me.
What does Justin Bieber’s Girlfriend smell like?
- Scotch tape and the glossy pages of Teen Beat covered in practice kiss saliva?
- A future episode of “Child Stars, Where are They Now?”
- Really bad lyrics?
- Selena Gomez’s panties? Ewww.
- “Crayons mixed with Bubblegum?”
- Juicy Fruit and Bonne Belle lip smackers?
Next to Bieber’s Girlfriend there was another celebrity scent:
I guess you can bottle 15 minutes.
My daughter and I went to have some lunch after we left Ulta.
Her coloring sheet gave me a heart attack and made me question my ability to read a calendar. Good job on the recycle though–the trees thank you. This didn’t make me cry, it made me laugh, so I threw it in today:
I googled Father’s Day just to make sure I wasn’t losing my mind.
We returned home, and I was looking through iTunes, thinking about buying some new music. I flipped to the classical music genre.
Yes, Fifty Shades of E.L. James’s wallet is raking in some more well deserved cash with a classical album.
I researched this a little bit. Apparently she writes to classical music. Some of these tracks were her inspiration for writing about the red room of pain and buttplugs.
“Christian likes classical music.”
So did the abusive husband in Sleeping With the Enemy. He didn’t get his own rapey album desecrating the art of classical music.
Her notable quote in reference to this album was, “It’s music to f*ck to. We all want that.”
My brain cells weep.
People are buying this shit.